Early this morning, being kept awake by a pesky cold, I pondered many important life issues. Mainly, I began to think about what I would do if zombies cornered me on the roof of a high-rise apartment building. I concluded (because I do my best thinking in my just-woke-up fog) that I would kill as many of these zombies as I possibly could (it would be impossible to kill them all) and then jump off the roof in an elegant backwards swan dive. If I were lucky, the numerous bodies of the less fortunate would cushion my fall and I would survive, but come on! I would never survive that fall. I am a realist, after all.
All of this led me to these very important questions, questions that you should all ask yourselves:
1.) Where would I go to escape a zombie uprising? Answer: The sky. If I do not have an airplane, helicopter, or blimp, I will settle for a boat and the ocean.
2.) What would be my weapon of choice? Answer: Grenades. Or dynamite. Really anything that will make zombies explode in mass numbers.
3.) Who would I want on my team? Answer: The high schoolers from Red Dawn. If they can fight the great threat of communism, they can handle the undead. I might also throw the fat guy from Varsity Blues in the mix for comic relief.
On a completely different note, my friend and I were talking today about how excited we are for this movie:
I will be there faster than you can say “George Michael in a tracksuit and sweatband.”
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6 comments:
why do you keep talking about my vag?
And oh man! I was that friend in that discussion!!!
And also, that latte made me sick, or maybe it was latte + spicy curry= big mistake.
I'm sorry. While you are sick from your latte, I am drunk on nasal spray and Nyquil. That's the only excuse for my vulgarity. I just thought that it (your vag) deserved a little bit of credit for keeping it real while the boobs get all of the attention. It was a very misguided attempt at raising your self-esteem.
yes, the way to my self esteem IS through my vagina.
Whadup, women's rights workers!
it's taken me 3 hours to choose what to write my 3-5 page paper about.
I sort of want to kill myself. And/or drop out of school.
Graduate programs? If I can barely get it together enough to write a three page paper then I think I might need to reconsider grad school.
All I want to do is watch Arrested Development.
It's taken all day for me to decide what to title my essay. Sadly, A Soul's Death is already taken.
Your lack of bloggage is suffocating me.
I miss you?
I dedicated a photo to you on my flickr.
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